A Million New Words From God?

Check it out!

For the past 600 years God pulled off a Hidden Advent in China, according to a new religion called The Church of the Almight God and it’s now available on the Web.

Ok, it is a hideously ugly Web site, but it does come with a million new words from God! You gotta love the Web – each week you can get the latest available translation delivered in English – straight from the original Chinese language! For Chinese language scholars, the original writings in the native tongue appear side-by-side with the English (the translators acknowledge their imperfections, thankfully, because the English is horrendous).  Here’s something we should research: is it a million new Chinese words or English words?

So what’s God’s new million words called? “The Voice From the Throne.”  Ominous! This time God provided a Forward to the new book! (But then he left out the dedication page!) Another convenience: The Voice comes in articles, not books like the last time.

Here’s what The Voice says to humanity – put this on the refrigerator, it makes a great memory verse:

No matter what, you should not intentionally contradict the word while you clearly know it is the truth.

The Voice is so strict – no intentional contradictions, “No matter what!” (What will Randy Campbell do now?)

Ok, so here’s something amazing – in the Chinese Advent, God either lost or forgot his name, because now it’s just “God” – but not Jesus Christ, according to The Voice:

This is a duty for all who are waiting for the return of Jesus on white clouds. We should remove the scales from our spiritual eyes and not become entrapped by those words that mount the clouds and ride the mist. You should carefully consider the actual work of God, and examine the practical aspect of God. Don’t always forget yourselves and drift on all day long, always expecting that the Lord Jesus, sitting on a certain white cloud in heaven, suddenly descends to be among you to receive you who have never known him, nor seen him, nor known how to obey his will. You had better think about something realistic!

Having refuted those “words that mount the clouds” about Jesus, The Voice says the Hidden Advent is “the practical aspect of God” – which means that someone or something has been moving around in China for the past 600 years – yet without any outward appearance!

Therefore, with respect to whether or not it is the flesh that God’s Word has become, the key rests with his substance (work, word, nature, and many other aspects), but not with his outward appearance.

“The key” is flesh without “outward appearance.” Ingeniously irrefutable! This explains why there’s no pictures! Bogus Bummer! I so wanted to see if the Hidden Advent looks like a hippie or not…

Ah, not to worry, The Voice says later, because the Hidden Advent does have flesh after all!

If the flesh does not possess the substance of God, then he will certainly not be the Word of God that has become flesh. There is no doubt about this point.

That clears up the doubt! (But where’s the pictures!?) If this all sounds confusing, here’s why:

Millions of voices are calling out to you, but it is hard to arouse your heart and your spirit.

I swear, The Voice has been to my house when it’s filled with Kyle’s teenage friends!

It’s really quite impossible to fathom the Hidden Chinese Advent because it’s a real mess, The Voice explains:

We should all be aware that people who are of flesh have all been corrupted by Satan.

An apt description of the Hidden Chinese Advent, wouldn’t you agree?

(PS: Don’t I get some stars for this?)

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